typing noises

I've been putting it off but I finally finished. I wrote the script to my film opening. I think the reason I put it off is because writing can be intimidating, and I don't want the things my characters say to sound forced or unnatural. But it had to get done so without  further ado here's my script:

                     

Although I think it's a good start it might be too long, but I haven't read it aloud all the way through so I'm not sure. I'm going to do that right now and record how long it takes.

-------reading--------

Okay done! I read over it about three times. The first time lasted 55 seconds, the second 56, and the last reading lasted a whole minute. I think the last one was the most accurate because I kept the pacing more realistic. So if the portion of the opening with music lasts about 50 seconds and the dialogue lasts one minute so I'm left with 10 seconds to spare. This works well because I want to try to use up the whole two minutes of time I'm given but I also feel like I should leave some extra time in case the scene takes longer than I thought.

So I guess I don't need to cut things down. But I still want to revise my script to make sure every line has a purpose. Also, I want to make sure that the supporting character isn't confusing for the audience. What I mean by that is I want the relationship between the main character and the supporting character to be clearly platonic so that the focus can be placed on the main character and her struggles. I also want the role of the supporting character to be someone that can easily be perceived as male as well as female because I haven't casted that role yet. When I first wrote the script I was picturing a male as the supporting character but I can't guarantee that so I'm going to revise it right now. I don't know. Maybe I'm getting too in head about this. I mean, it's only a minute long and the supporting role's pretty gender neutral as it is but I think the script could be better.

-------revising--------

Okay so looking back the dialogue is pretty platonic. The more I read over it the more I try out different deliveries for each line and I'm realizing that it's just a matter of how the scene's acted out. Also, I've gone through every line and made sure that it serves a purpose to make sure the scene isn't aimless. In the end, there's not that many changes I'm making, just a bit of rephrasing so that it sounds more natural. For example, there's a line where the main character talks about her engagement on social media and instead of making her talk about the specific times at which she has the best engagement I'm going to make her talk about likes because it's more realistic. Anyways, here are my notes:

Now it's time to update my script with the minor changes. Next time: casting.